'Hearthstone' Golakka Crawler Eats Pirates For Breakfast, Also My Heart

Golakka Crawler + Me =
Golakka Crawler + Me = Blizzard

I have hated a lot of decks in Hearthstone , but nothing comes close to the disgust I feel towards Pirate Warrior. The gross early game value that no deck can even come close to matching, combined with the cocky attitudes and spamming emotes of its players. Every time I see a N’Zoth’s First Mate followed by that murloc yelling Charge, I get sick to my stomach. I’m willing to admit I’ve played some cheesy decks in my day, I got to Legend the first time with Secret Paladin, but Pirate Warrior is just awful to play against.

Before the Year Of The Mammoth rotated in, Blizzard nerfed Small Time Buccaneer which I hoped would mean the end for the Pirates. Turns out it was only a small bump in the road for Garrosh and his mates, who are still one of the best decks created from Mean Streets Of Gadgetzan . When the Hearthstone team announced Journey To Un’Goro , I prayed to as many Old Gods as would listen for pirates to finally get to walk the plank and leave my games forever. I didn’t get that, but I did get a crab that loves to eat scallywags as a consolation prize.

Golakka Crawler has become a staple in this meta for Hunter, Rogue and other decks. Eating a Pirate and turning your two-mana minion into a 3/4 is no joke; thankfully crabs never laugh. The purple pincher has quickly risen to the top of my favorite Hearthstone cards list, pushing Savannah Highmane out of the spot for favorite Beast. It has good stats on its own, but the value it can get in certain match ups is absurd. Playing against a Crystal Core Rogue who’s got a 5/5 Southsea Deckhand on board? Eat that Charging Pirate and show these Captain Jack wannabes who the real terror of the deep is.

If Patches, Bloodsail Cultist and Swashburglar all had to swim with the fishes, I’d be a much happier man. Still, Golakka Crawler is a nice consolation prize to help me deal with the thousands of netdeckers who think they can square up against my minions.

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