'Moana' Is The Perfect Disney Movie, The Damsel Is No Longer In Distress

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Moana, a beautiful story I need more of
Moana, a beautiful story I need more of Disney

Moana is an amazing movie that breaks Disney stereotypes with its wit, clever visuals and “I’m not a princess” attitude. Adapting Polynesian culture for the average audience isn’t easy, but with the help of Dwayne “Don’t Call Me Rock” Johnson and newcomer Auli'i “You Can’t Pronounce My Name” Cravalho, Disney managed to do the impossible. From the visuals, to the story, to the characters, to the set design, everything is pieced together so seamlessly that even Merida's mother from Brave couldn’t weave a tapestry so beautiful.

The story goes like this: Maui, a demigod and overall righteous dude, stole the heart from the god of the Earth, throwing the balance of the universe into wack. A plague of darkness spreads across the world, eventually affecting Moana’s island, forcing her to leave her homeland and find Maui so that he can return the heart to where it belongs. None of that really follows the generic Disney princess story of: girl finds boy, girl gets in trouble, guy saves boy, cue happily ever after music.

Moana is a proud woman, who gets herself, and even Maui, out of trouble on multiple occasions. Whether it’s fighting gods or dealing with dumb chickens, Moana always finds a way to solve her problems. Take a splash of Hercules mythology, throw in a cup of bubbly Disney princess, add just a splash of star appeal and intrigue, bake in a Disney think tank for a few hours and you end up with a masterpiece.

Ever since Frozen , Disney has been on a role with its CGI animated movies. Wreck-It-Ralph and Zootopia are absolute masterpieces, and Moana stands tall with those goliaths of animation. To say I loved this movie is an understatement – it moved on a level I didn’t think movies were capable of anymore.

The score, written by Lin-Manuel Miranda, might even give Frozen’s soundtrack a run for its money. Miranda wrote and starred in the wildly successful Broadway play Hamilton, which I know because my showtunes obsessed sister would not stop squealing about throughout the entire feature. The songs are catchy, I dare even the hardiest punk rocker not to be humming along with the music after you exit the theater.

Pua is in all the movie's marketing, but barely shows up in the film.
Pua is in all the movie's marketing, but barely shows up in the film. Disney

Spoilers:

I have two tiny problems with Moana . First off, even for a Disney movie, it has some pretty weak comic relief. Pua, the competent pig that helps Moana in the beginning of the movie, gets quickly replaced by a mentally handicapped chicken. The chicken is too dumb to eat its own food and loves to swallow shiny rocks. This dumb ass chicken bogs down the movie, but the same can be said about any comic relief in a Disney movie. Meeko from Pocahontas, is just as annoying.

The ending to Moana feels a bit rushed. We have this long, beautiful journey of a demigod and a not-a-princess trying to save her home and then at the final battle with a giant volcano god, we get….. nothing. The heart gets stuck in the monster’s chest, she turns into the jolly green giant and the world is happy again. Imagine if instead of beating Ganondorf in the Legend Of Zelda , Link decided it would be better to hug it out.

Spoilers Over

Moana is a new Disney classic, one that historians will look at year’s from now as part of the second Disney renaissance. We live in a world where Pixar makes sequels ( Cars 3 and Incredibles 2 should be awesome) and Disney makes ground breaking works of art. If someone had told me this a decade ago, I would have laughed and shoved a VHS of Pocohontas 2 in their face.

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